Finding love has its own set of challenges regardless of sexuality or gender identity. But, like it or not, the rules and guidelines of dating in the LGBTQIA+ community are unique. This is why finding a dating app that is tailored to the queer dating experience is so important.
Beyond matches asking you to explain your identity, many apps don’t offer enough options around gender and sexuality for people to feel like they can even answer basic profile information correctly. “As an LGBTQ dater you’ll be reminded that we are a minority,” notes Adam D. Blum, MFT, a licensed psychotherapist and the founder of the Gay Therapy Center, the largest private therapy provider for the LGBTQ community in the US.
Finding an app that caters to your sexuality can make the difference between nights spent on your couch alone and ones spent with a partner. Inclusivity is vital for all marginalized people, and the dating apps that enable you to feel seen, heard, and understood provide you the best chance of meeting the right person or people for you.
We’ve rounded up the best dating apps for LGBTQIA+ daters—including ones that myself or Blum have used—so that you can decide for yourself where to potentially find your match. It’s good to remember that they may have smaller pools than a standard cishet-focused app, so a single one might not be your final answer. Blum mentions that “in most cities, you will reach the end of the scroll of potential matches in your area. This is why many LGBTQ daters use several apps.”
Taimi
Unique features: Voice and video chat, verification process for safety
User Base: Taimi is the only major-usage app that is completely LGBTQIA+ plus but does not cater only to a specific demographic within the community. That gives it a unique user base of over 17 million people.
Privacy Policies: Personal data is collected; no one under 18 allowed
Cost: Free, with paid options between $4.99 and $9.99 monthly
Real User Experience: Taimi leads the pack in inclusivity, offering users many options for gender, sexuality, and pronouns. It’s easy to use and walks you through creating a profile. Thanks to its large user base, you’ll have plenty of people to swipe through.
The “interests” and “vibes” sections of profiles are highly useful for finding potentially viable matches. Unlike other apps, Taimi has a black background. Users of the dark setting on iPhone will love this, but personally, it was a deal breaker because I just can’t read and comprehend content that isn’t black-on-white. Unless you have this same issue, it’s a great app to try for any LGBTQIA+ person.
Her
Unique features: Relationship models, pride pins on profiles for easy ID
User Base: Her uses the term “FLINTA,” which stands for female, lesbian, intersex, nonbinary, trans, and agender. In short, this is mainly an app for women, and accepts anyone except cis men. It has a user base of over 13 million.
Privacy Policies: Personal info may be shared with affiliates; “Do Not Track” settings are respected
Cost: Free or $14.99 a month
Real User Experience: I’ve used this app for close to a decade and it’s where I found my girlfriend, who is by far the best match I’ve had in life. I preferred the paid version because it saves so much time to see who has already liked you, and Her gives you a week free of it when you sign up.
The app is perfect for anyone who doesn’t want to have to sift through cis men, and it’s very quick about deleting them when their profiles are reported. There’s a large community section where you can join groups, as well as lots of informative articles and blogs. The only downside to Her is its messaging platform, which can be slow and which if you don’t pay for premium does not allow users to scroll all the way back to the conversations’ beginnings.
Grindr
Unique features: Geolocation based, networking options
User Base: Targeted towards gay, bisexual, and transgender men, over 13 million people use this app.
Privacy Policies: Location info is needed for service to geolocate; personal info is shared with third parties
Cost: free or $19.99 a month
Real User Experience: This app is unique for its focus on geolocation, so that you can meet others who are very close to where you are physically.
While it can be used for relationships, it is more commonly used for hooking up. “The expectation among most users is that sex is the first priority,” says Blum. He notes that “relationships may grow from hookups, but the immediate focus is sex. The filters, which include choices of sexual positions, emphasize this.”
For those looking to meet someone without too much time or talking first, Grindr is ideal. If you’re looking for a long-term relationship, you may find it’s a pain to sift through so many people seeking hookups.
OKCupid
Unique features: Deal breakers, diverse age range
User Base: While not specifically targeted to the LGBTQIA+ population, OKCupid has as many, if not more, inclusivity features than community-specific apps, and boasts a user base of 12 million.
Privacy Policies: Face geometry data collected for verified profiles; personal info used for marketing purposes
Cost: free or $29.99 a month
Real User Experience: Despite not being an app that is specifically geared towards the LGBTQIA+ population, OKCupid is a destination for it thanks to its strong inclusivity elements. I used this app for many years, keeping it active while in relationships whenever I was looking for new friends—it’s great for meeting people in non-romantic ways, too.
Some of the most counter-culture people I’d ever seen were on here, making it a great fit for younger daters, left-wingers, and anyone outside the mainstream. It filters potential suitors based on personality questions, so the more of them you answer, the more your swiping options will be geared toward you and your dating goals.
Feeld
Unique features: 20+ gender/sexuality options, coupled profiles
User Base: Billing itself as a dating app for “open-minded” people, Feeld’s 2 million users embrace alternative relationship models such as polyamory and is very kink and fetish friendly.
Privacy Policies: Collected data is eventually scrapped after account cancelation; personal info may be shared with law enforcement
Cost: Free or $14.99 monthly
Real User Experience: LGBTQIA+ people are more likely than cishet people to engage in non-monogamy,1 so it makes sense that Feeld is heavily populated with that community. It also boasts as many, if not more, options for sexuality and gender, than queer-specific apps do, and has no limit on how often or how many times you can change yours on the app. I used this app on and off for a few years and met multiple women I dated on it. I did find it to be even flakier than other dating apps in terms of people never responding to messages or dropping off mid-convo.
Things to Keep in Mind
It may be daunting to try a dating app, but all the ones we’ve reviewed have systems in place to help you feel as safe and as accepted as possible. If you’re still feeling hesitant about downloading one, just remember that you’re in the driver’s seat. “It is good to remember that on an app you remain in control. If you don’t like the request you can simply delete it and move on. There is no need to engage with anyone who doesn’t interest you,” explains Blum.
Now that you have more information about different dating apps, you can take that first step to creating a profile on one. From the comfort of your home, you can see what’s out there—and there just may be someone out there who’s perfect for you!